The Ceremony, How Things should be done.

Today's blog comes after a discussion with a bride over what aisle should be used when the particular church does not have a center aisle. With that said I have decided to do a blog and hopefully answer several questions about what to do and what is etiquette for the ceremony.

Seating Parents:

The parents of the bride always sit in the first pew on the left, facing the pulpit; the groom's parents, in the first pew on the right. If the church has two aisles the bride's parents sit on the right side of the left aisle (As they Enter Church from the back), and his parents sit on the left of the right aisle. This way, they are both seated in the center section of the church.

Seating of Immediate Family:

Behind the front pews, several pews on either side of the center aisle are reserved for Immediate family. The people who are to sit there can be given a pew card to show the usher or the usher my keep a list of guests to be seated in the first few pews.

Seating of Guests:

The ushers show all guests to their places. They should ask any guests they do not immediately recognize whether they wish to sit on the bride's side (the left) or the groom's side (the right). Just as the reserved pews are divided more or less evenly, so should the rest of the church be divided.

In taking the guests to their seats, each usher should offer his bent right arm for the women guests to hold on to, with their escorts walking behind them.

The Ceremony:

Once the bride reaches the front of the church she let's go of her father's arm, transfers her flowers to her left hand and gives or father gives her right hand to the groom.and the brides arm goes through the left arm of the groom.

Just a quick bit of information on the ceremony, based on questions that I am asked frequently and info that I thought would be most helpful.

Welcome Gifts for Your Guests

It is a great idea to have a little something waiting for each guest in their hotel room upon their arrival. You can make up boxes and fill them with goodies and a personalized note. You may also want to provide an itinerary to remind guests of any wedding events, along with a few recommendations for places to dine and sites to see in your area or the area of your wedding. Here are a few suggestions of some fabulous welcome treats.

Welcome Sack

You can get great canvas totes. You can personalize these with the Bride and Groom Initials, or maybe a painted stencil of the Chinese symbol for love. Personalizing with iron-on transfers is fun, too. Fill it full of:

Bottles of Water

Chocolate balls

A Chinese take-out container filled with a decadent assortment of dried fruits and nuts

A little book on Feng shui

Have fun with what you put in each bag.

Hats off to you

Hats can be a fun way to package things, sombreros are great or any straw hat.

Bottles of Water

A bag of pretzels

Bubble bath

A disposable camera

Mouthwatering handmade toffees

All about Orange

Fill a decorative box or a Kraft paper bag with goodies that you've chosen in a specific color scheme.

Tangerine-flavored sodas

Miniature marshmallows

Jelly Belly jelly beans packed in miniature paint cans with personalized label

A pair of tangerines, which are healthy and likely to survive any minor accidental squashing. Present these in burlap bags.

Nostalgic Knickknacks

Bucket of goodies to greet guests.

Salt-and-vinegar chips

Bottles of old-fashioned lemonade (World Market is a great place to find these)

Candies

Gum

A Rubik's Cube for a touch of nostalgia

Other Welcome Bag Treat Ideas:

A deck of playing cards can be personalized with an image or you names and the date. Order them at www.customplayingcards.com .

Sunscreen and flip-flops are perfect for a sunny location

Your favorite novel

A guide to the city

A bottle of wine

Decadent bath products

A pair of terry cloth slippers

Personalized T- Shirts

Travel Puzzles, or maybe a jigsaw made out of a special photo.

What ever you choose will be great. Just knowing that you thought of them will make your guests so very happy.

Gracious Gifts For Parents

You may like to give a special gift to each of your parents to thank them for their love and support and all of their help, or for paying for your wedding! Some great ideas:

A Journal filled with all the wonderful memories you have of your childhood and the time leading up to your wedding.

A photo album embossed with note such as "for the memories to come"

Tickets to the theater or the opera

A weekend away

Jewelry for Mom and cuff links for Dad

It is always important to give Mom and Dad a little token to show your love for them and your gratitude for their support of you.

Stress Free Living Points

Hi Everyone,

Today I am taking a break from my information on Weddings. One of the most common things I hear from Brides and Bride's Mothers "I am so Stressed"! Well I get that way too, I am reading a book "101 Ways to Stress-Free Living...How to Declutter your Mind, Body, and Soul by Suzannah Oliver. This is a great book and I recommend that everyone get a copy if you are prone to stressing out.

Through out the book there are what she calls "Stress-Free Living Points". She breaks them down in groups of five. I love these and just gives us something to thoughts and actions to ponder if you will. I find them helpful and I am hoping that you do as well.

Keep in mind the only thing a bride should ever have to worry about on her wedding day "How will I look?" "What will my Groom's reaction be when he sees me"? and "Will My Daddy Cry"? and they always cry.

Stress Free Living Points 1-5

(101 Ways to Stress-Free Living...How to Declutter your Mind, Body, and Soul)

Suzannah Oliver

1- If you are stuck in "Heavy Traffic".... Think "What's the hurry? I'm enjoying the journey"

2- If you have just been denied a promotion....Think "I have an incentive to explore other employment opportunities."

3-If you have received bad news.....Think "What can I do right now that is positive and that will improve the situation?"

4- The more often you take positive action, the more of a habit it will become. Soon you will virtually have wiped the words "bored", "lonely" and "sad" from your vocabulary.

5-Laughter really is the best medicine, Indulge in "laughter therapy" when you feel stressed-no matter what others think of you, laugh it off.

Like I said, I hope this is helpful to you, but I tell you this book is amazing. It seems to be helping me. Well I hope all is well with each of you and we will talk soon.

Clay

Photography Shot List

Found this in a great book title "Style Your Dream Wedding" by Susie Coelho. This is one of the books that I use for my inspiration. This is a list of Photograph suggestions that will add to your bridal portfolio.

Getting Ready

Bride's Clothes hanging on the wardrobe, on the bedpost, or over a chair.

Bridesmaids doing bride's hair and make-up.

Bride and Bridesmaids getting dressed, applying makeup.

Mother/maid of honor/aunt/others helping bride with one last detail, such as veil.

Full-Length Shot of bride in gown checking herself out in the mirror.

Detail of clothing, shoes, garter, something borrowed, something blue.

Bride with parents/stepparents

Bride with siblings

Bride Hugging honor attendants

Bride with Bridesmaids

Bride with all the women.

Groom getting ready with dad and pals (tying the tie is a classic)

Groom with Parents/Stepparents.

Groom with Siblings

Groom with his arm around Best man

Groom with all the groomsmen

Groom with all the groomsmen smoking cigars

Groomsmen putting on boutonnieres or bow ties

Dad's last-minute advice to groom

Groom Ready to Go

Bride Ready to Go

Bride and Groom separately making their way to the ceremony (in a limo, hailing a cab, walking down the street/hall/stairs

The Ceremony

Guests streaming into the site

Ushers escorting guests to their seats

Ushers escorting Moms and Grandmother's to their seat

Close up of groom's adorably nervous mug waiting for his other half

Bridesmaids and groomsmen walking down the aisle

Flower girl and/or Ring bearer entering

Honor Attendants walking down the aisle

Honored Guests being seated before the wedding

Wedding Party waiting at the alter

Groom Walking down the aisle

Bride and dad/escort/parents walking down the aisle

Close up of Bride just before she makes her entrance

Bride and Groom at the alter

Alter from the back during the ceremony

Wide shot of audience during ceremony, from Bride and Groom's point of view

Faces of Bride and Groom as they exchange vows.

Close up of Bride's and Groom's hands as they exchange rings

The Kiss

Bride and groom preceding up the aisle, guests' smiling faces at their sides

Bride and Groom outside ceremony site

Congrats shots; bride and groom hugging, laughing, with good Friends and family.

Bride and Groom leaving ceremony site.


Before or Immediately after Ceremony at the Church

Bride and Groom together

Bride with her parents

Bride with her entire immediate family

Groom with his parents

Groom with his entire immediate family

Bride and Groom with all Parents

Bride and Groom with immediate family members from both sides

Bride and Groom with groomsmen

Bride and Groom with Bridesmaids

Bride and Groom with whole wedding party


The Reception

Shot from outside reception site (to set the tone)

Family Tables

Guests' Tables

Reception Details such as the place cards, guest book, centerpieces, decorations, table settings, favor tables, and champagne glasses

Bride and Groom Arriving

Receiving line moments

Close-up of Friends and family making toasts

Bride and groom sipping champagne

Bride and Groom chatting up the guests

Bride and Groom's First Dance

Parents dancing

Kids playing or dancing

Musicians or DJ doing their thing

Guests going nuts on the dance floor.

Bride laughing with bridesmaids

Cake Table

Bride and Groom cutting the cake.

Bride and Groom feeding each other

Dessert Table

Bouquet Toss

Tossing and catching of the garter

Bride and Groom leaving waving form getaway car's backseat

Rear of Car departing.

I hope this is helpful. Also just a tip contract with your Photographer for the event not a 3 or 4 hour time period. You will be be so happy that you spent the little extra time to capture all of the wonderful reception.

Clay

Let There Be Music

Today's Blog is coming after a Bridal Consultation yesterday where music for the ceremony was discussed, and I realized that I needed to address Music both for the ceremony and the reception. Often times music is an afterthought, but is one of the most important parts of any ceremony and reception. Music adds joy, solemnity, fun and a sense of tradition to a wedding. It serves as ceremony cue, as pleasant background to conversation, as a call to dance the night away. In fact, no other single element of your celebration has the power to engage the emotions the way music does.

Music at the Ceremony

If you are having your wedding ceremony at a church. be sure to check for any restrictions. Your officiant may refer you to the church music director, who can review the parameters of the musical scores available to you and provide you with acceptable options.

The following are some guidelines to use when planning your ceremony music:

*Ask about Acoustics. Your choice of music may not be the best selections for the acoustics of your ceremony site.

*Find out if you can use visiting musicians. If you are bringing in your own musicians just make sure that is allowed, some churches require you to use their church musicians.

*Consider you guests' preferences. Make sure that your music selection does not offend a guests' sensibilities. Some Guests' make consider a popular secular tune disrespectful in a church ceremony. If you are having your ceremony in a church plan on including hymns in your music selection.

*Consider the services of the house organist. Plan on using the services of the church organist. He or She will know the acoustics better.

*Discuss how and when payment is made. If a church includes a bill, the fee for the organist is often included and you can write one check. If not he or she must be paid directly, either cash or check, before or directly after the service.

*List the songs and players. On your program for the ceremony you will want to list the music that is performed during the prelude as well as during the ceremony. Be sure to get the correct names of each piece and add the composer.

The Order of Ceremony Music

When working with the music director or organist, organize your choices into the following components of your ceremony.

The Prelude

It is a happy beginning when guests arrive at a wedding to the joyful sounds of music. The prelude music should begin at least a half hour before the ceremony begins. It can be played simply by just the organist or performed by a string quartet; it can showcase the smooth strokes of a harpist or the woodwind ensemble.

Samples of Prelude Music

*Air (Handel)

*Rondo (Mozart)

*"Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring" (Bach)

*Largo (Handel)

*Concerto No.1 (From Vivaldi's The Four Seasons, "Spring")

*Pavane (Faure)

The Processional

The processional music begins as the Grandparents and Mother's are seated, the groom and his best man enter, the bridesmaids and the bride and her father enter (or other escort) and her attendants are ready to begin their walk. The music can simply be an organ or piano. You may have a trumpeter accompany the organ, adding a joyful touch to the processional. Music played during the entrance of the bride and her attendants should be joyous and formal at the same time. The same piece can be played throughout the processional; sometimes the bride's entrance is accompanied by a different piece of music.

Samples of Processional Music

* "The Bridal Chorus" (Lohengrin)

* "Wedding March" (from Mendelssohn's A Midsummer Night's Dream)

* "The Prince of Denmark's March" (Clark)

* "Wedding March" (Gulimant)

* "Air (Bach)

* "Canon in D Major" (Pachelbel)

* " Arrival of the Queen of Sheba" (Handel)

* "Trumpet Voluntary" (Clark)

* "Trumpet Tune" (Purcell)

The Ceremony

Work with your officiant and music director or organist to determine where in the service music should be placed. Make sure that if you do use soloists that practice time with the organist or other instrumentalist is scheduled.

* "Ave Maria" (Schubert)

* "One Hand, One Heart" (Bernstein and Sondheim)

* "Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring" (Bach)

* "Joyful, Joyful, We Adore Thee" (Beethoven)

* "The King of Love My Shepherd" (Hinsworth)

* "The Lord's Prayer" (Malotte)

* Biblical Songs (Dvorak)

* Libestraum (Liszt)

* " In Thee is Joy" (Bach)

The Recessional

The music you choose for your recessional should be the most joyous of all. It is a jubilant time, and the music should reflect that jubilation. Often the bell note on the organ or bells in the bell tower are rung to add to the festive ambiance. Look for upbeat, joyous music.

Samples of Recessional Music

* "Ode to Joy" (Beethoven)

* " Trumpet Voluntary (Clarke)

* " Wedding March" (From Mendelssohn's A Midsummer Night's Dream0

* "Trumpet Tune" (Purcell)

The Postlude

Samples of Postlude Music

* Overture (Handel)

* Rondeau (Mouret)

* "Le Rejouissance" (Handel)

Make the music at your Wedding a Forethought and not an afterthought. It is a lot more important that you think. I am hoping that this is helpful to everyone.